Peek-a-boo

So it has been seven months since I last formed a coherent post.

 Cryptic explanation for my absence but in the effort to play fair to all.....I can say only that life got rough. While we heal, and until I get the energy and know how to open another blog where more privacy can be practiced, I figured I'll just post an odd picture here and there with a bit of commentary. I feel the need still to provide the girls with a place to come and "have memories".....feeling a bit disingenuous by only posting the sugar coated version of this time in our life ...but the meatier memories really do not belong in the public forum!

So to go back and try to catch up....or put up the current and try to go back....hmmmm....thinking going back is still a bit risky emotionally so let's start here and work back slowly.

I am still sewing. Less frequently but it still provides me with solace and sometimes even helps to 'fill my bucket'...like with the pictured dress...not my most creative or artistic creation but one that is getting to live the life I had hoped for it ....and then some!!! Thought it would be cute for an Olympic opening ceremonies party...but it was bought for a little girl who will be wearing it to the ACTUAL opening ceremonies in London!!!

Had my Dad staying with me for a couple of weeks around the fourth of July. Certainly hope I have his longevity genes! 87 years old and he kept up with us 'kids' as we took in two straight nights of fireworks.

A proud grandpa with his granddaughters Alyssa, Julia, and Mari.

Not to be out done we have a proud Dad with his girls...

 

It was hotter than Hades all week so a little frozen treat was in order!!

 

A rare photographic feat...Patrick and I in the same frame!!!

 We are still into our 'traditions'...this is our annual trek to The Original Rainbow cone on the south side of Chicago...almost no pictures to show because while we ate ice cream a big storm came pounding through and we had to duck for cover!!

As we drove home we feared for what we would find....

 

...and with each passing block it got worse!!

But we were spared any real damage!!! Better yet, we were one of the VERY FEW houses left in town WITH power!!! Meant we became the temporary hostel for my parents, my sister, niece, nephew, and a brother as the 105 degree days without electricity were life threatening

 in their own way!!

In the end of June we held another pair of annual traditions....the family picnics!! One weekend devoted to Patrick's mega family and the next devoted to my mega family. Such a blessing really that my girls have 30 first cousins. 

One of my favorite shots of the 'teen girls' at my family's picnic....if I wasn't on my laptop I might have been tempted to find one of them when they were the 'toddler girls'....but then that would be too depressing....seeing the change and knowing that Mari is the only one in the above picture who is not yet a driver or in driver's ed....but only because she has a December birthday!!!

To think this was only a portion of my immediate family at the picnic....because we waited too late in the day and missed a few of the early departees!?!?....kind of joyful that both of my parents were able to attend since not one single other of the cousins left in their generation were able to make it out to the picnic grove but also kind of depressing to see the wheelchair and walker in the picture )-:

Sentimental as well to see Julia starting to tower over her cousins on her Dad's side of the family....

...and see her in the sack race with her 'favorite' sack that once came to her neck!!!

We have almost NO family pictures lately...and then we get two in as many weeks that we really like...go figure!

Patrick had a lovely time with his brothers but this too was a bittersweet year for him...to only have 3 of the 8 siblings able to gather for the reunion....)-:

Now speaking of bittersweet!!!!!!!! Brace yourself for the last event to be covered in today's post.....

Yessiree Bob!!! I am now officially the parent to a HIGH SCHOOL FRESHMAN!?!?

Literally in that she has already taken one summer school class!

This moment marked an unbelievable milestone in our lives in so very, very many ways. All I can say is, while part of me was extremely relieved to have this moment....part of me wondered how the heck that little bundle of brains that walked with me onto a plane in Guatemala City had gone from a chatty toddler so eager to find out what those big neon letters on the store fronts meant that she taught herself to read at 30 months old...to a third grade wordsmith who found her spelling tests to be so unchallenging that she did all of her words backwards and loved to show off her skill to spell backwards to her Auntie Peggy at every opportunity....had become a young woman heading off into high school????

See what I mean??? This happened!! When all I see is ....

....the toddler who's eyes drew us in and led us to her in Guatemala!!

Okay, enough sappy sentimentality for one post!! Just leave you with a couple of pictures of Mari celebrating the milestone at her 8th grade Luau...

Dresses and Dances

Been a fairly normal week. Possibly the most profound words I can type these days! I went back to work. The girls went back to school. Routine looked a lot like....routine.

Besides the job, I also worked some more in the salt mine. The birth family food fund was completely drained with the extra holiday deliveries of food and gifts so I need to get the Etsy shop stocked!!

Have five more in various stages of completion (-:

The week ended with a new experience for us. Very happy to have 'survived' as I'm sure this experience will be an oft repeated one in the next few years!!!

It involved a group of teenaged girls crowded in a bedroom wall papered in Justin Bieber posters.

It involved a BUNCH of electric hair appliances trying to turn a 

certain Maya mane into a fancy hair do.

There was pizza and salads...and chocolate rice krispie treats to steel the nerves!

Because Friday night was the 8th grade dance!! 

When I look at this picture all I see are the

Homecoming and Proms racing our way 

on the high school horizon that is quickly coming our way.

This trial run went pretty darn well (-;

The Salt Cure

Well another good sign of our journey back to life is that I felt enough energy to get back into the sewing room!!

[aka salt mine as named by the hubby]

Made this for a little friend heading off to Disney World this weekend. I am thinking of doing up another couple in the other princesses to put in my Etsy shop since the fund for the birth family's food basket deliveries was depleted at Christmas!! The only problem is finding a fair price. It did charge my batteries back some...I have Mardi Gras outfits swirling in my head that are begging to be made....maybe there is something to that 'salt cure' of old after all! (-:

Taking Comfort...in food, what else???

One of my reasons for being a bit unsure of just where we are on the spectrum of healing is this peculiar problem of food!! Yes, we are ALL happily self-medicating our emotions with food. Our waistlines are suffering mightily...but in my new 'Amsterdam perspective' I'd rather fight fat that some of the other self-destructive behaviors that are out there! I used to think I would cook when I was content and happy. You know, the nurturer doing her thing?!?! Lately I've been cooking...A LOT...because it is safe. It is something that takes my mind to someplace familiar. I know what I'm doing when I'm in the kitchen. I know where the cooking process is taking me. Eating together has been one of our safety nets.

So lately, and thanks to a new internet addiction to the Pinterest site, I've been itching to try out a few new recipes. I take this as a sign that the fog is lifting and I'm regaining an interest in the 'nurturing' side of cooking rather than the 'routine' of cooking.....at least that is what I'd like the believe! So today I came across a recipe that just SCREAMED to be made...and I had all the ingredients on hand...and a bit of comfort wouldn't be such a bad thing?

Sopapilla Cheesecake [a la Mahoney]

Upfront confession time- the 'a la Mahoney' means that AS USUAL I tinkered with the original recipe. I do that. ALL THE TIME. My family will happily regale you with the many flops that have occurred as a result of my stubborn need to make a recipe 'my own' but this was one of the many that worked. Quite well if I do say so myself! But it still needs a tweak...

...and a more experienced baker will look at this picture and know exactly what I'm about to say!! You see the original recipe calls for you to unroll a can of crescent rolls into a greased 9 X 13 pan and then add the filling. But we LOVE cinnamon sugar so I had to sprinkle a bit to up the flavor quotient. I will do that again next time too!! There was also this handful of strawberries left over from the weekend that were reaching their prime so, what the heck, I chopped them up and sprinkled them over the crust. There in lies the problem!!!

The next step involved spreading a mixture that was 2 blocks of cream cheese, a cup of sugar, and a teaspoonful of vanilla. A rather thick mixture. Over loose and soft strawberries?!?! Next time I spread the cream cheese mixture FIRST and then sprinkle the strawberries.

Then you unroll a second can of crescent rolls over the top and pinch the seams closed. Pour a 1/2 cup of melted butter {I would use less next time...yes, the butter addicted family would reduce the butter?!?!?} over the top and sprinkle a 1/2 cup cinnamon sugar over that and

bake at 350 for twenty minutes.

Can you say simple AND scrumptious?!?!??

The official baked goods taste tester added a bit of whipped cream...because it wasn't fattening enough as is I guess? He was so unsure of the quality rating that he had a second piece just to make sure it was safe to serve the girls...who also had two pieces...just because it was so warm and scrumptious.....and comforting!

It's a New Year....?

We walked our way through the holidays. Not sure anyone but Julia really ever 'felt' the holiday. Not that there weren't plenty of feelings...just not that special awe inspiring emotion usually found around this magical time of the year. We made it mostly because we could all see that the darkest part of the journey we have been on of late is beginning to look a bit brighter.

We finally decorated the tree. Okay, Auntie Peggy finally finished our tree but it was while I was busy cooking a for a family dinner night. All the 'right' gifts were bought and wrapped and duly delivered. 

All the family visited...we even hosted my Dad this year as our ranch style home was better suited to his ever increasing frailty.

I made and served two Thanksgiving dinners as well as Christmas and New Years. We changed up the Christmas 'tradition' a bit now that there are no more Santa believers.

Midnight mass followed by the gift opening marked the beginning of a new tradition.

 

 ....and we did all of this when what we really wanted to be doing was laying curled in our beds with the covers over our heads and hoping the phones would stop ringing. Depression, grief, anxiety, PTSD, SAD, menopause, and adolescence all ganged up on us at once and it sucked every last ounce of strength from us that it could. But we have been blessed with a loving family who came and propped us up and jobs that provide the benefits and income for us to seek the care and intervention of specialists. Together those helped us find the strength to get up and walk our way through the holidays!

We are walking a little stronger each day.

The dark is not quite so black. Not sure if we are just in a clearing or if we are on our way into the light? I suspect the first, especially since there is another adolescence racing towards us at a VERY high rate of speed.

But the family is still close and the specialists are on speed dial so I have to hope we will make the trek out into the valley on the other side of this mountain before long. Now to find the strength to take the tree down...sometime before Valentine's Day!!!!

Happy New Year!