Wednesday, July 8, 2009

I wanna be one less.....

commercial!!! See, with Julia gone Mari and I decided to get a little one-on-one time together. The awful weather was the leading factor in choosing a night lounging on the couch, eating Rainbow ice cream, and channel surfing together. All went smashing until a fateful T.V. commercial pushed me into "THE TALK"!!!! Not "the talk" because thanks to an older cousin she found out about 'puberty' when she was just turned 8. I dutifully ordered the highly recommended "The Care and Keeping of Me" from The American Girl catalogue which she has since memorized. Both of her schools took 'the field trip' to the Robert Crown Center so the biology of puberty has been well covered! It's that part involving HOW God puts the babies in a woman that I've not had to explain......until last night that is!!! Thank you so much Food Network!!!!!!!!!!! All because of your need to pay those celebrity chefs I now have an 11yo who's spent most of last night and today trying to get "the awful image out of her head" :) (how her Mom and Dad hope that take lasts a while!!!) No, it was prime time, family programming so the commercial didn't show her "the awful image" but it lead to the following exchange....(don't worry, I edited for squeamish sensibilities) Mari: "Hey Mom, that just said that you should have me vaccinated!" Mom: "Yeah, but it's still a new shot so Mom is holding off until you REALLY need it to make sure there aren't any surprise side effects." Mari: "But Mom they said 9 to 26 year olds should get it and I'm already 11!" Mom: "Well that's just a recommended time frame." Mari: "Do you want me to catch cervical cancer?!?!?" Mom:"You don't 'catch' cervical cancer. The vaccine is for the Human Papilloma Virus which if you catch that may lead to cervical cancer." Mari:"How do you catch HPV?" Mom: "From an infected person." Mari: "Who's an infected person and how do they give it to me?" Mom: silently to self "Oh God now I'm cornered!", out loud to her "You can't tell who's infected by looking at them and you get it by having sex." Mari: "Oh.....and exactly how do you get it during sex?" Mom: deep sigh, deep sigh, then "THE TALK"!!! Mari: "Okay, that's gross! I'm glad that you and Dad didn't do that!!" Mom: "What makes you say that?" Mari: "Me and Julia are adopted!" As she is heading off to middle school in August, I just didn't think I could leave her thinking that logic...I'd hate for her to say it to a friend and be ridiculed! So the conversation continued........until her Dad pulled in the driveway. As he closed his car door and headed up the walk she just shook her head and looked over her fleeing shoulder saying, "I'll never be able to look at him ever again without seeing 'that awful image' in my head!" Half of me shook with laughter as the other half mourned the loss of my 'little girl'. Thanks alot Guardasil!!!!!


  1. LMAO sooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooo true..right? LOL

  2. ROFL!! Thanks alot to commercials indeed! I had the talk with Lee Jr. and he swears he's never doing that!! LOL

  3. OMG, I was so feeling you girl. I can not imagine and yet with two girls, I know I'm going to have to have that talk but FOOD NETWORK, WTH?????!!!! YIKES..............Now when I get to WHERE I HAVE to have the TALK (better not be for a long time and no food network channel here), I'm going to be giggling over your conversation!!! LOL